short/long update

hmmm just want to write a bit. this week hasn't been the best week for me. had to experience shock therapy, twice. oh well, trying to stand still, though i admit is not easy. dan abis ngalamin gini rasanya sangat tidak bersemangat sekali buat lanjutin ngerjain ta. rasanya pengen kabur aja, udah deh ga usah pake ta2an. gile yah, waktu ke sidang akhir udah tinggal sebulan kurang, tapi design gw pun masi blum diapprove sama si u-know-who. ga pernah kebayang seumur idup mo lulus bakal disusahin ky gini. seumur2 kuliah di untar pun jg ga pernah sesusah ini rasanya. DI1 sampe 5 bisa lulus lancar2 aja, tp knp lg ta gini susah bener yah. dan abis ngalamin shock therapy gini, rasanya slama ini gw ga bisa desain, rasanya ky jd ga pede sama desain sendiri. dan rasanya sangat menyesal napa gw pilih topik ta ini. smurrf!
tp anw maren gw nntn sermonnya ps jose yg when u stop growing. dan dari situ gw jd diingetin bbrapa hal. i'll just paste it from my journal.
* ketika orang lain ga mengerti dirimu, ato mgkn lo disalahmengerti, ketika lo harus belajar mengerti orang lain, bahkan sama orang yang mgkn umurnya udah jauh di atas kamu, itu brarti Tuhan kasi kamu kesempatan untuk jadi lebih dewasa, bahkan lebih dewasa dari org itu. Dan kyny ini ngena banget sama gw. Gw harus ngertiin si u-know-who, this is a time n opportunity for me to grow wiser n more mature.
*ketika kamu dihadapin beban apapun, mau di keluarga, kerjaan, kuliah, or in my case skripsi. Rasanya bebannya berat sekali, but it’s the opportunity for u to grow. untuk streching ur faith, ur ability n ur capability. Ky otot yg distrech waktu work out, rasanya sakit, but next time otot itu jadi udah terlatih untuk menghadapi beban yang lebih berat. So it’s a work out time for me now. Rasanya sakit, but I’ll enjoy it when it’s over.

n ini jg bbrp yg gw dpt dr buku joel osteen:
*keep singing ur song. Despite of things negative that happens, we still have joy in our hearts. Sing ur song means u’re being grateful to God, and believing that He takes care of you, and He will turn your situation around on time. So, be grateful, keep on praising Him. He’s good.
*smile! Even if you don’t have any reason to smile. Smile by faith. Smiling sends a message to your whole body that everything is going to be okay. Be grateful n smile!
*believing is different than expecting. Believing is passive, expecting is active. So when u’re expecting for God to turn your situation around, u’re doing something about it. we do the best that we can do, and let God do what we cannot do. Leave the rest to Him.

ahh *tarik napas dalem2, buang*

okeh, banyak belajar dan diingetin jg sih. tp emang susah2 gampang yah. hr ini udah berusaha supaya tetep semangat dan berjuang buat lanjutin revisi ta, tp sejujurnya sayah mengakui klo sampe saat ini pun ms blum berhasil. udah buka max n cad seharian tp yg baru gw kerjain cuma ngerender design lobby yg kmrnan, pdhl itu pun udah ditolak sama si u-know-who. hiks

ok i run out of words now.